What is Spiritual Direction?

This beautiful image with a magnet for the refrigerator was given by Teresa Hogan, a friend from the faith sharing group I am in. She bought it from the famous Myeongdong Cathedral in Seoul, Korea. When I beheld the 4cm square print of a painting (see above), it straightaway struck me as a beautiful image of what spiritual direction is all about. 

Spiritual direction is about accompanying someone on a journey. Although the picture is actually one of a couple on a journey, it can be anyone. I liked the idea of the spiritual director carrying a staff with a cross at the top, a symbol of our dependence on Christ’s finished work during our spiritual journey. The small sail boat at the harbour reminds us that the journey we take away from the safety of home, may be marked by strong winds and massive waves at some point, and having a companion on this journey of life is vital. Most blessed of all is to have the nurturing and caring Spirit watching with love over our going out and coming in (Psalm 121) and this is pictured in the white overarching cloud in the picture. 

I decided not to stick this to the fridge. I will keep it and place it at my desk to remind me what this ministry is all about. But what exactly is Spiritual Direction? Let me give you some of the descriptions that was given to us during one of the lessons in the Spiritual Direction Formation Program I am attending.

“An interpersonal relationship in which one person assists others to reflect on their own experience in the light of what they are called to become in fidelity to the Gospel” (Carroll & Dyckman).

“Spiritual direction, as we understand it then, is directly concerned with a person’s actual experiences of his relationship with God …. religious experience is to spiritual direction what foodstuff is to cooking. Without religious experience there can be no spiritual direction. 

We define spiritual direction, then, as help given by one Christian to another which enables that person to pay attention to God’s personal communication to him or her, to respond to this personally communicating God, to grow in intimacy with this God, and to live out the consequences of the relationship. The focus of this type of spiritual direction is on experience, not ideas, and specifically on religious experience, that is, any experience of the mysterious Other whom we call God. Moreover this experience is viewed, not as an isolated event, but as an expression of the ongoing personal relationship God has established with each one of us”. (Barry & Connolly S.J.)

A spiritual director made this observation in one supervisory session: ‘Spiritual direction is like panning for gold. A directee comes and together we dip into the stream of their life and pull up all kinds of things. Rocks of all sizes – I can never guess what is coming next – all kinds of conflicts and problems, then all of a sudden some fleck or nugget of pure gold emerges into view in the bottom of the pan as we swirl the water around, emptying out the rocks.’ This is a powerful and captivating metaphor of the process of spiritual direction. Together, the director and directee look at everything – whatever is in the water and the pan – during their session. The director receives the directee’s life and everything in that life, helping the directee contemplate the gold among all the conflicts and block and stuck places. A skillful, graced director gives that gold reverence, time, interest, and attention until the directee realizes how much more valuable and significant are the flecks of gold – the experiences of grace and the Spirit – then are all the stuck or problematic areas of his or her life.” (Ruffing RSM)

“Spiritual direction seeks primarily to enable the seeker to achieve a deep relationship or grounding in God and thus to live a life of total freedom, individuality and deep love. This is an awesome and complex process which entails ridding oneself of past psychological injuries and traumas, false ways of thinking and acting, and undue attachment to any person, possession, or spiritual practice. At the same time it encourages and fosters a practice of deep prayer so that one can discover ones’ deepest self, and thereby find the will of God in one’s life.” (Alice McDowell)

If you are looking for spiritual direction, Life Direction Singapore , an ecumenical group that has a list of available trained spiritual directors of Catholic or Protestant backgrounds.

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Spiritual Direction Formation Program: The Practicum Phase

It has been a year and I am in semester three of my spiritual direction formation program. I have observed that formation always took priority over information. This is good. This is the way it should be. We learn to listen to God, to listen to one another, and listen to movements in our soul. This growth does not come by more information, but by more formation: awareness and discernment through personal reflection, through spiritual direction with a spiritual director, and through faith sharing in groups.

After three rounds of giving direction to one another in-house, we now enter the phase of spiritual direction practicum. Each us have to find two directees to give spiritual direction to under an experienced supervisor. I feel excited about this phase, and look forward to learning more about spiritual accompaniment. The formators are very serious about the formation of spiritual directors, and want to ensure that even during this phase the volunteer directees will benefit from their sessions.

On Saturday, we had a Day of Prayer at the Franciscan Missionaries of Mary retreat house opposite the Botanic Gardens at 49 Holland Road. In each semester, a few days are devoted to such retreat days or week. We learn to be aware of what God is doing in our life and to respond to his invitations. 

For the first half of the day, we were instructed to reflect on the past year and to observe movements, encounters, people, blessings and joys, struggles and burdens, doubts and certitude, passion or aridity, hope and longing. As I reflected on the past year I gave thanks for the excitement and joy of observing the personal and spiritual growth in my formation. The highlights of my year were mostly related to the formation program.  

Lunch was fulsome: bento sets, beverages, banana cake, chocolates, and grapes. All was eaten in silence. We were to savour the fullness and richness of this blessing. I was so satiated I found myself wishing for a nap. 

The afternoon reflection was thankfully more tangible, since we had a heavy meal. We each took prayer shawls of different colours, cuttings and patterns. The long prayer shawl of the Jews is called “tallit/tallith”). “Tal” means tent. “ith” means little. Thus, with the shawl over our heads we set up a little tent, and invite God into our home, and we fellowship with Him in private prayer. The four fringes of the shawl are called “tzitzit” and comes from the Hebrew word “tzutz” which means “to gaze”. What a beautiful description of what should happen in prayer. With this “tent” we were instructed to meditate on the uncertainty of the journey ahead of us, similar perhaps to the twists, turns and movements of Joseph and Mary, accompanied by the holy infant Jesus. I have no certitude of what the future holds, but with God’s presence, I feel very assured and rested that like Joseph, who was entrusted with Jesus, I would experience the provision and providence of God.

At the end of the day of prayer, it was announced that we will get a confirmation via email of who we are giving direction to and what we need to do. I look forward to this new movement.

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Inviting the Mystic, Supporting the Prophet: book reflection

Initially I was intrigued by the title of this book written by Katherine Marie Bykman & Patrick Carroll. It caught my curiosity. As I read the foreword and introduction, I felt drawn to the authors’ thesis as it was something I wholeheartedly agreed with: the tests of authentic prayer are in the fruit of the praying life or the community. I was interested in the relationship between prayer and service, mystic and prophet. 

I was not disappointed as the authors describe the symbiotic relationship between the mystic and the prophet in the believer’s life. “The starting point is not as important as that the circle be complete: prayer leading to life, and life leading to prayer. Real prayer leads to involvement; real involvement leads to prayer. Deeper spirituality impels to action; action impels to deeper spirituality, and the circle continues and deepens. The mystic becomes prophet, the prophet becomes mystic” (Dykman & Carrol, 80).  I used to believe that every plan or service should spring from prayer, but now I am willing to concede that for some people, action came first, and I should not disparage some “prayerless” action, but guide such active persons to seek God in prayer more.

I like the authors’ description of spiritual direction. It is not narrowly confined to the guided development of the directees’ prayer life, but a journey with them in their larger faith development, which includes conversion, struggle, integration, awareness of reality and a call to radical love, not just the prayer life.  The call to radical love would include immersion in works of service, justice and compassion. “All these holy people are holy not just because they pray or write eloquently about that prayer, but because their prayer leads them to respond to Christ in the given historical cultural moment. All of them respond in a unique way to unique situations in which they find the Lord calling to his people. But all respond outside themselves in service. Each mystic becomes a prophet”(Dykman & Carrol, 82). This reminded me how this emphasis on mission and service is so similar to Ignatian prayer spirituality.

The chapter on PRAYING THROUGH THE DESERT is particularly enlightening for me. The authors gave two descriptions of the desert experience in prayer: one from St John of the Cross of the 16th Century mystic and poet, and another through Thomas Merton a 20th Century mystic and poet. I found both helpful and complementary. The advice to spiritual directors leading others through the desert experience is to help the directee look at his or her larger or entire life. “We cannot judge our prayer, whether it be consoling or desolate, by how we feel when we pray, but rather by how we are loving when we live” (62). A person’s prayer life may be desert-like but an examen of his life may reveal God’s loving activities and presence in many areas of his life of service. This helps him see that God’s love is as strong as ever and that the desert may be God’s way of moving on the purification of his faith in and love for God and not the result of his sin.

I enjoyed this book and found myself underlining many sentences and paragraphs. These definitely deserve further reflection and discussion with the Lord. 

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