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What is Spiritual Direction?

15 January 2023 blogpastor 2 Comments

This beautiful image with a magnet for the refrigerator was given by Teresa Hogan, a friend from the faith sharing group I am in. She bought it from the famous Myeongdong Cathedral in Seoul, Korea. When I beheld the 4cm square print of a painting (see above), it straightaway struck me as a beautiful image of what spiritual direction is all about.

Spiritual direction is about accompanying someone on a journey. Although the picture is actually one of a couple on a journey, it can be anyone. I liked the idea of the spiritual director carrying a staff with a cross at the top, a symbol of our dependence on Christ’s finished work during our spiritual journey. The small sail boat at the harbour reminds us that the journey we take away from the safety of home, may be marked by strong winds and massive waves at some point, and having a companion on this journey of life is vital. Most blessed of all is to have the nurturing and caring Spirit watching with love over our going out and coming in (Psalm 121) and this is pictured in the white overarching cloud in the picture.

I decided not to stick this to the fridge. I will keep it and place it at my desk to remind me what this ministry is all about. But what exactly is Spiritual Direction? Let me give you some of the descriptions that was given to us during one of the lessons in the Spiritual Direction Formation Program I am attending.

“An interpersonal relationship in which one person assists others to reflect on their own experience in the light of what they are called to become in fidelity to the Gospel” (Carroll & Dyckman).

“Spiritual direction, as we understand it then, is directly concerned with a person’s actual experiences of his relationship with God …. religious experience is to spiritual direction what foodstuff is to cooking. Without religious experience there can be no spiritual direction.

We define spiritual direction, then, as help given by one Christian to another which enables that person to pay attention to God’s personal communication to him or her, to respond to this personally communicating God, to grow in intimacy with this God, and to live out the consequences of the relationship. The focus of this type of spiritual direction is on experience, not ideas, and specifically on religious experience, that is, any experience of the mysterious Other whom we call God. Moreover this experience is viewed, not as an isolated event, but as an expression of the ongoing personal relationship God has established with each one of us”. (Barry & Connolly S.J.)

A spiritual director made this observation in one supervisory session: ‘Spiritual direction is like panning for gold. A directee comes and together we dip into the stream of their life and pull up all kinds of things. Rocks of all sizes – I can never guess what is coming next – all kinds of conflicts and problems, then all of a sudden some fleck or nugget of pure gold emerges into view in the bottom of the pan as we swirl the water around, emptying out the rocks.’ This is a powerful and captivating metaphor of the process of spiritual direction. Together, the director and directee look at everything – whatever is in the water and the pan – during their session. The director receives the directee’s life and everything in that life, helping the directee contemplate the gold among all the conflicts and block and stuck places. A skillful, graced director gives that gold reverence, time, interest, and attention until the directee realizes how much more valuable and significant are the flecks of gold – the experiences of grace and the Spirit – then are all the stuck or problematic areas of his or her life.” (Ruffing RSM)

“Spiritual direction seeks primarily to enable the seeker to achieve a deep relationship or grounding in God and thus to live a life of total freedom, individuality and deep love. This is an awesome and complex process which entails ridding oneself of past psychological injuries and traumas, false ways of thinking and acting, and undue attachment to any person, possession, or spiritual practice. At the same time it encourages and fosters a practice of deep prayer so that one can discover ones’ deepest self, and thereby find the will of God in one’s life.” (Alice McDowell)

If you are looking for spiritual direction, Life Direction Singapore , an ecumenical group that has a list of available trained spiritual directors of Catholic or Protestant backgrounds.

Pastor Hock Lin & Dora Chua’s Golden Anniversary

11 January 2023 blogpastor 1 Comment

What a memorable Golden Anniversary! Pastor Hock Lin and Dora Chua have been married for 50 years. That is 18,250 days, or 438,000 hours, or 26,280,000 minutes of journeying together in covenantal love! Pastor Gabriel Han, the apostolic elder of Ministers Fellowship International, Singapore, gathered pastors for a celebration for the Chuas at the stately Singapore Cricket Club. We were blessed by the fellowship, food, prayers and the speeches.

The Chua’s marriage was marked by God’s grace. I could see God’s hand upon their life together, as they shared and encouraged us in their speeches. “Out of His fulness have we all received, grace upon grace, blessing upon blessing” (John 1) seem to me to be the verse that best describes their marriage.

Opposite traits attract before marriage, but after marriage they can attack. This was part of their experience and they were transparent in sharing glimpses of the tension, which resolved with communication, the input of loving community, and sheer patience. This couple was very real in their sharing, and we all could relate to them.

It was an encouraging, inspiring time as different people impacted by this couple shared their stories. Clearly, the Chuas have ministered effectively to a wide variety of people and situations: singles and couples, ministers and businessmen, church members and those outside of church circles. The one element that marked their ministry was the love of God that they reflected in and through their lives, marriage and ministry. More than one mentioned how personal and caring they were.

The second element was their gift of ministering the word in season, even when the word was challenging. A pastor shared how Hock Lin said to him, “You have to spend more time with your wife”. The Chuas were tutored at the Lord’s feet and often spoke for Him. “The Lord has given me the tongue of those who are taught, that I may know how to sustain with a word him who is weary. Morning by morning He awakens; He awakens my ear to hear as those who are taught” (Isaiah 50:4a).

As I reflected on the celebration, three of the memorable quotes I remembered were, “God gave marriage to help us grow in Christ-likeness, but if this was not enough, He gave children”, “It takes a community to grow a marriage”, “The Seawards helped us in our marriage.”

The Singapore Cricket Club is a lovely place with a British colonial feel and the rooftop space offers a vantage view of the Padang and the cityscape. The buffet was superb and as we sat around the table we got to know other pastors and leaders. It was a wonderful evening and I personally felt blessed.

After the celebration, as we walked to the City Hall MRT Station we could see people lying down or seated on the grass field, watching a light show projected onto the Singapore Gallery (former Parliament building). This relaxed scene was the cherry on top of this lovely anniversary celebration. My wife and I seldom go to the city, and it dawned on us that it could be quite interesting to do so at night.

If you have been blessed by the Chuas and wish to add your story or simply congratulate them, do add some words in the comment box above.

Why Play Pickleball: Ten Reasons

1 January 2023 blogpastor Leave a comment

What is this sport that is a craze in New York? What is pickleball? How would I usually describe it to friends? “Imagine a badminton court. Bring the net down to the height of the tennis net. Replace the racquet with what looks like an enlarged table tennis paddle made of plastic. The ball is plastic and bigger than a table tennis ball but smaller than a tennis ball.

Why did I consider picking up this sport? I was persuaded to try this sport by my wife Jenny. She has been playing this for many years. Now that I have retired, I could join her. I grew to like it and now it has almost displaced my hiking and cycling hobbies. Here are a few reasons why.

First, it is fun. The fun is in the play, the people, the pleasure you feel when you execute a shot well that you never thought you had in you. Even if in the end the match was lost, you still felt good.

It is challenging. It is an easy sport to pick up and start playing, but to master it and play well is quite a challenge. There are many skills to learn, each of them difficult to master at a high or consistent level. It can be frustrating when your progress is slow but exhilarating when others notice the improvement you have made.

You exercise without feeling like you are exercising. The first game I played I was totally out of breath. Now, after a year, I can play continuously for an hour without worry. My fitness has improved. I exercised without realising it because all I was conscious of was the fun of the play.

It brings you into contact with people. You get to be acquainted with a lot of people, mostly seniors, even though now this sport has captured the attention of the younger people. It is an opportunity to broaden your friendship circle and get to know more people who are of different social circles and religion from you.

You can play this sport into your 80s. Some sports become unsuitable as you age. This sport can be played even into your eighties. I have seen two elderly men playing at the age of eighty and beating others younger than them. I could not believe they were in their eighties. Regular play in this sport keeps you young at heart.

It develops strength, flexibility and endurance. You get stronger in your legs and arms and core. You become more flexible as you will need to stretch every now and then before and after the game (warm ups) and during the run of game. Endurance is built up over regular practices over a period of a few months. You become agile and your reflexes are improved.

It is a team game. It is usually played in doubles format so there are four persons in every match of eleven points. The dynamics become interesting depending on who the two persons are. Having a partner to play with lessens the amount of running and coverage of the court. It also makes you more aware of the other’s playing style.

It is available free of charge for seniors. If you are above sixty, you do not have to pay for the use of the courts. For those below sixty the fee is about $18 a month (2022). However, by internal arrangement, we pay an agreed nominal amount for purchase of shared balls.

You need to use your brain. With time and practice, skills and stamina can be developed, but what will help most is brainwork: learning strategies that will help you in your game. Knowing your opponents and their strengths and weaknesses helps you to play better against them. It is thus a thinking game too. Like most other team sports.

Now for the tenth and final reason: It is not expensive to begin. All you need is a paddle. A new beginner paddle can be purchased for about $40 to $80. If you are willing to use a pre-loved paddle owned by someone in the pickleball group, this same amount may get you an intermediate or advanced paddle. The next investment would be to buy court shoes which are more suitable than running shoes (which most participants begin with). This money and time are well spent when you consider it as preventive health care. Better to invest your time and money in this sport than in medical care from poor health.