Spirituality and ageing

Category: Spirituality and ageing

Where Are You? Gen 3:9

8 May 2024 blogpastor 8 Comments

Well, Lord, I was on the mountaintop enjoying the fresh air and views with You. Freed from pastoral work in church, and able to do only what I love and want to do, I felt a new lease of life and vision. My physical health improved and the doctor took me off blood pressure pills. I enjoyed the slower pace of life, the simple joys of home-bound living during the two years of the covid pandemic, and enjoyed preaching in my home church and in other churches as well as in teaching missions. I received formation as a spiritual director with a wonderful community of brothers and sisters, many of whom became friends and fellow ministers. I was blessed by an ecumenical community of spiritual directors and religious who taught, formed and loved us. I tasted the privilege and joy of accompanying others in their journey of growth. Thank You, Lord, for a sweet retirement and transition in new avenues of ministry.

Lord, this year I found myself in the valley of distress and uncertainty when my wife was attacked by bacteria on her spine which caused unbearable pain for her, and anguish for me as I felt powerless to relieve that pain. Thankfully, even in the valleys of life, You are actively present. You gave me this verse in Isaiah 43:2, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” You spoke and I was strengthened (Daniel 10:19).

My wife was in the ward and the community hospital for a total of 51 days. You were with her in her pain and her deliverance from it. She went through the spinal operation You granted us a godly surgeon, Dr Reuben Soh, and his skillful hands stabilized her spine and removed the cause of her pain. She had antibiotics infusion for weeks on end. You gave the infection specialist Dr Jean Sim the wisdom to treat my wife. It was a medical emergency and she was in grave danger, but You, O Lord, was with her, and today she is recovering well. You moved many pastors, friends and my church family to pray and You heard and answered them: today she is well and no longer in pain. Lord, You are so good.

Lord, I thank you that now I am out of the valley and in the plains. My wife Jenny is at home getting stronger with her twice-a-week physiotherapy sessions at St Luke’s Hospital and she continues with an oral antibiotics course. I am less tired and at peace. I am also beginning to return to the routines and joys that were a part of my usual schedule. I continue to preach and teach and this gives me joy. I continue to give spiritual direction to a few persons who want You to direct their lives. I have begun to edit and refine the first draft of an e-book that I have written. I was able to continue playing pickleball twice a week whenever possible. Beginning in May, I will be putting on my backpack and hiking shoes and preparing pilgrims for their camino in October 2024. Lord, You also answered one of my longstanding prayers as I did not know what course to use my Skills Future Credit on. Soon I will attend a course on Artificial Intelligence, and it will be conducted near my home too. Thank you for sending Susan who talked about and recommended the course and helped me to sign up.

Lord, I know there are some limits to ministry and meetings when they conflict with physiotherapy and medical appointments. These limits, I believe, are necessary and will only be temporary. I believe Isaiah 43:2 and You will strengthen my wife and make her as active and healthy as before.

Lord, does this answer Your question?

How I Tackle Rising Cost of Living

12 June 2022 blogpastor 4 Comments

In recent weeks, the cost of living in Singapore has risen exponentially with electricity, fuel, transportation and food costs biting families in their wallet. How can we tackle these costs? Let me share some of my ideas, and please do contribute your ideas in the comments too.

The pandemic prepared us

The lockdowns and pandemic in Singapore have in some ways prepared us for the challenge of high inflation we face today. I remember that during the lockdown and pandemic that lasted about two years, we learned how to adjust ourselves to a simpler lifestyle. We ate out less, and cooked and ate in often. We even went marketing less to avoid crowds or we bought our food via Redmart, and stocked our fridges with as much fresh food as possible. Even fresh chicken became frozen chicken. We got used to eating frozen foods which were usually cheaper than the fresh version. We worked from home and saved a bundle on transportation costs. Perhaps the greatest savings came from being unable to travel overseas for vacation. We made do with staycations and outdoor pursuits like hiking and cycling- two activities which boomed during the pandemic. The current inflation can be handled by living like we did during the pandemic: the simplified life.

Pinch or punch

Many Singaporeans though are earning sufficiently as a family to feel only a pinch to their pockets and I do not see them alarmed by the rising costs (except for those who own cars), nor do I see them willing to sacrifice fine meals in restaurants, or even overseas vacations as costlier jet fuel impacts the cost of air travel. For the lower income earners, struggling single income families, and less resourced retirees the impact will be less of a pinch, and more of a punch in the stomach.

Newly minted retiree

As a fairly resourced newly minted retiree, it is not as bad. It has been a year and a half since I retired. I mostly live off my savings and my children’s generosity. I leave my CPF retirement income undrawn so that it continues to earn interest. I find that my needs have lessened considerably with retirement. I do not need to buy new clothes like I did before because my current wardrobe is more than adequate, and it keeps growing with my eldest son’s hand me downs. However, recently I had to buy shoes and quick-dry sports clothes from Decathlon for the new sport I adopted – pickleball.

My wife and I cook and eat home often. I prepare breakfast, she does lunch and dinner, thank God for her. She is happy whenever we fast from some meals. I have a hand me down bread making machine from another son, and I sometimes make bread. Nicer experience, healthier, cheaper. Two or three times a week we go out to the hawker center or malls for meals. For health’s sake, we try to eat the way our parents fed us: more vegetables and less meat. Besides health benefits, it costs less.

It seems that Singapore will move towards being more of a first world nation. In most of these countries, it is expensive to eat out, and people do it occasionally unlike in Singapore. Admittedly, it is wonderful that we had enjoyed first world efficiency, institutions, and standards and yet managed to keep eating out affordable, but now this seems to be gradually fading. Hawker food prices have been inching up, and it is set to increase considerably in the near future. In time, we will be like other first world nations.

Car and travel

When I see how the COE prices have escalated, I cannot but thank God that the ten years of COE I purchased costs only about $26,000 at the time I bought it. Now it is $73,000 (category C). Talk about inflation! My Toyota Allion is about 13 years old now and though fuel prices have rocketed, I do not drive as much as before retirement, but I still keep this little bit of luxury for convenience.

After retirement, I was hoping to travel and vegetate/hibernate overseas in different countries for about a month each. Not as a tourist flitting from one interesting place to another, but soaking and being fully present in a locality for a few weeks. But the pandemic crashed these plans. I was not deeply disappointed though. Travel is fun, but I would not feel less alive if I am deprived of it. When I was working, travel was like a temporary escape bubble, to take my mind and emotions off stressful situations, albeit for a week or two. I prefer silent retreats as they are more like a decompression chamber, a healing room, a car servicing center, a spa where I soak in God’s love. Now that I have retired, I find less need of a vacation to destress. If I do travel, it will probably for interest, for friendship, for family, for discovery not recovery.

From production to reduction, accumulation to consumption

In retirement and during the pandemic, I find myself in a natural process of moving from production to reduction. However, this does not have to mean that I stifle or strangulate myself from enjoyment. I do not have to be stingy towards myself or others. Nor do I have to be less hospitable.

Retirement is also a movement from wealth accumulation towards consumption, from less saving to more spending. The squirrel gathers food for winter in order to consume it not to further preserve it. Whatever I have (whether saved or given to me) still belongs to the Lord and he is not a tight-fisted nor stingy. Rather he is very generous and is happy to bless me, his son, and see me enjoying the good things he has provided. I can still give to the church and those in needs, buy people meals, and buy myself things for my hobbies. When I see my grand-children doing life without worry because they know they have parents who provide for them, I want to have that child-like trust in my Father in heaven, who promised to love and provide for me in my old age: “Even to your old age and grey hairs I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you” (Isaiah 46:4).

Yet I save money whenever and wherever I can, if it is sensible. I like Carousell. I have bought quite a number of pre-loved things like camera lenses, furniture, bicycle and bicycle accessories and have been satisfied with them. Now with the impending GST increase from Jan 2023, I need to think of any big-ticket items I may need and consider buying them earlier. With Malaysia opening up, making a day trip up would be a good money saver for certain items as well as having good food at affordable prices.

Reduce debt and be debt-free

I also maintain as far as possible a freedom from the debt trap. I do this as part of my stewardship values: to borrow as little as possible and to live within my means. Credit card debt is a big “No” for me. Any loans taken must be justifiable (house, car – if needed for work), and payable without being stifling or suffocating. I would not take loans for renovations, travel or big-ticket consumer items. Loans are to be taken seriously and paid back responsibly and diligently, reducing the principal as often and as soon as possible. Very conservative, you might say. However, it fits my faith conviction that borrowers are the tail and not the head. Borrowers are slaves at the mercy of lenders and interest rates they have no control of. With this kind of practice, I worry less and have maximum flexibility to live without being bound to a means of livelihood.

Godliness with contentment

I find joy in my relationships with God, family, church, and friends. I find joy in ministry, spiritual growth, hobbies like hiking, cycling, photography, writing, reading, and lately a new sport I picked up called pickleball. This last sport has enlarged the circle of people I am getting to know. When I am deeply and widely connected with God and people, I become more whole, integrated and life takes on greater depth, because we were created in God’s image, and God is love, which is found in meaningful relationships. Indeed, as St Paul teaches, “Now godliness with contentment is great gain” (1 Timothy 6:6).

It is natural to complain about rising prices but I find it self-defeating and depressing. I find it more fruitful and blessed to be thankful for everyone, and for everything that God has provided and will provide in the future. It is so good to be thankful that I have a loving and faithful God in every situation I find myself in. I rest in the blessedness of knowing I am deeply loved, greatly blessed and highly flavoured (deliberately misspelled). It is time for me and you to live out the songs we sing every Sunday!

This is how I tackle rising prices, but my life is relatively simple. Others have much more complicated lives. God has blessed some with millions and God would require more of them in faithful stewardship. Others run businesses and have employees. Others support a large extended family. Then there are people in the opposite spectrum: those who have gambling or shopping addictions or heavy credit card debt. They are at a loss. I encourage them to obtain financial advice from godly money management experts. In the meantime, pick up some of the above ideas that are applicable for you! These are matters about which we can agree to disagree. So be at peace. God bless you!

Combining Two Pleasures

8 April 2022 blogpastor Leave a comment

To be able to combine two pleasures is a great blessing. I enjoy catching up with pastor friends and cycling, so to have these two pleasures combined is time well spent. I have had the pleasure of doing this recently in two cycling trips with pastors. One was from Khatib MRT to Labrador MRT following the Round the Island route. A second was from East Coast Park (car park D1) to Changi Point and back.

Khatib to Labrador (RTI)

When National Parks published the partially completed Round The Island (RTI) route, it inspired me and I asked a more experienced pastor, cyclist and YouTuber, Eng Hwa if he would like to do this route. He said yes and we agreed on the date. Later I invited one pastor Paul Loh to join us. Paul was a pastor in charge of logistics in New Creation Church before he began his own regional ministry of equipping pastors and church planting. They both lived in the north, one in Sembawang and one in Yishun. I lived in Jurong East. So I folded my Brompton bike at Jurong East MRT and took the train to Khatib MRT station. It was 23 Feb at 7am when I boarded the train. The ride all the way to Changi Point was predictable with a few familiar scenic places, where we stopped at to take pictures and rest.

At Changi Point we ate at the hawker center and we got to know each other better, lingering over cans of 100 Plus, a necessary isotonic drink for such long-distance rides of over 70km. It helps to prevent cramps.

After lunch we continued our ride and took regular timeouts to rest, drink and chat. We were stuck for about 15 minutes at a bus-stop along the East Coast because of sudden rain. After that we kept going all the way to Marina Bay and passed the many bridges along the Singapore river.

Fatigue began to set in along the Alexandra PCN. From then the going was tough but somehow by God’s grace, sheer perseverance and 100Plus, we finally reached our destination with great joy and a sense of satisfaction. We reached Labrador MRT station at 5.23pm. From there we took the train home with our folded bikes. What an unforgettable trip. I now have a deeper respect for those who do the full round the island route like it was a piece of cake.

East Coast D1 to Changi Point

There were more pastors on this trip because it was organised on a Monday so a still-working Anglican pastor Vincent could join us. Another pastor Richard Wong is executive director of T-NET, a disciple-making ministry. Although he is working, he has a flexible schedule. The rest of us are retired pastors Eng Hwa and Seng Chor and myself. We enjoy doing whatever the Lord bids us to do in this new season of our lives. We have the greater flexibility.

This was not our first pastors cycling trip. We met at a free car park D1 at the East Coast Park. The day was beautiful but according to the weather report, sunny at noon and rainy in the afternoon. It was one of those days when the weather forecast was highly accurate. We had fun riding all the way to Changi Point and chatting over Tiong Bahru chicken rice, and later downed with chendol dessert at another location opposite the hawker center. The talk over the table was about the church during the pandemic, catching up with each other about what’s happening in our lives, and the Russian invasion of Ukraine.

*Richard, myself, Vincent, Seng Chor, Eng Hwa*

On the way back, the rain hit us in the afternoon, and we had to speed up and ended in the exact same bus stop as during the February cycling trip, all wet from the rain. After a while we decided to ride in the drizzle until we reached the hawker center near the Bedok Jetty. There we loitered for quite a while over hot teh tarik, and left under a drizzle because the rain refused to stop.

I gave a ride to pastor Vincent who lived fifteen minutes from my home. Thankfully we could put two foldable bikes in the car. Although we were drenched, it was an eventful outing, and I enjoyed the ride of 40km, and the camaraderie. This is one kind of environment that helps men to build relationships: doing things we enjoy together and tossing in some meaningful conversations. We are planning another cycling trip, this time from Jurong East to Marina Bay and back.