Preaching – Page 5

Category: Preaching

Saying Goodbye To Solemnising Marriages

30 May 2021 blogpastor Leave a comment

I was allowed to download wedding photos of Jeremy and Eleen Ling. They are the last couple whose marriage I would solemnise in my forty years of pastoral ministry. I was surprised I became sentimental as I viewed photos taken by Eirik Tan of me presiding over my last marriage ceremony.

*The last solemnisation I would be doing*

OLD WEDDING PHOTO ALBUMS

It made me wonder: if this is the last, whose marriage was the first I had solemnised? I could not remember. I looked at my old photo albums and there were quite a number of photos of couples whose marriages I solemnised, and a few of me at the pulpit giving the exhortation, and only one of me doing the solemnisation: Peter and Susan Ting’s wedding. I could not jog my memory no matter how hard I tried. Even my wife was clueless.

*Peter weds Susan: the only old photo I have of myself doing a solemnisation*

*I started out by giving the exhortation at wedding*s

One picture in particular stood out. It was a picture of me and my mentor and predecessor, Pastor Johney, laughing about something at a wedding that he had solemnised. Priceless picture.

*My predecessor and me having a good laugh.*

The old photos put a smile on my face and I decided to take some snapshots of a few and sent it to one or two persons. These photos made me look at a younger skinny me with a full head of hair, and sometimes with a mustache.

*My moustache added to the gravity of the occasion*

SIGNS OF MY GOING

In recent years, I have noticed photos and videos of my balding head in wedding photos, and I winced each time. It reinforced my conviction that it is time to make a final walk down the aisle and lay down my book of Marriage Service.

I am glad my successor of the English congregation, Pastor Alvin Lim, will be taking over this solemn responsibility. Besides MDiv, and counselling degrees, and experience in marketplace and church leadership, he has a full head of hair! However, the application process was delayed and that is why I was still doing this despite my retirement.

FROM TENSION TO CONFIDENCE

The early years of giving wedding exhortations were tense because I was too eager to make an impression, to capture the audience’s attention by making the message interesting, with humour, stories and quips. Trying too hard to be memorable.

In the later years, I realized that I need to keep the main thing the main thing. The vows and declaration are the most important climatic moment and all other components of the marriage service: the songs, the videos, the processional music, the message, must be subservient to, and should not outshine the apex of the ceremony. I began to develop spartan homilies of ten minutes length based on a Bible text that the couple want to make into a key reference point for their marriage. I want the focus to be on the solemnity and power of the vows.

JOY IN THE MIDST OF CHALLENGES

Doing this duty has its challenges: holding marriage preparation sessions, giving priority to the dates chosen by couples and working my schedule around them; preparing wedding exhortations; going through a rehearsal; and getting dressed and conducting the ceremonies. Despite this, I have always found it a joy to do weddings. Funerals are draining emotionally. Weddings are totally different. You get immersed and infected with the joy that is oozing everywhere you look. You cannot help but be flooded with the goodwill and happiness of everyone around you.

Now as I say goodbye to solemnisations I feel thankful for the privilege of being a part of what would be one of the most significant event in a married couple’s life. I grieve, but I am so thankful to God for the privilege in the last four decades.

What has been your experience of Christian marriage services? What were your loves and loathes? What is for you the most important component or part of the whole service? What are your greatest frustrations during this disruptive pandemic year that has past?

If you happen to know that you are the first couple whose marriage I solemnised, do let me know in the comment box or drop me a WhatsApp note. Thank you.

Three Steps Forward, Two Steps Backward

17 May 2021 blogpastor Leave a comment

I was given a warm welcome at the sanctuary on Sunday. It was my first time preaching in my home church after six months of rest. I was glad to do so. Sadly, there was no on-site congregation, as the pastoral team had decided that the sustained spike in Covid 19 cases, and the government tightening of rules made it wise for them to return to streaming the worship service without on-site congregation.

Initially, I was informed to wear a mask while preaching. I tested different masks at home because if the sound was muffled, people will switch off rather quickly. I found a mask of spongy material that did not muffle my voice. However, by Saturday night I was informed that the authorities allowed speaking and singing by two singers without masks on if there is no on-site congregation. I felt such relief, because the mask is a barrier to effective communication.

AWKWARD TO PREACH TO EMPTY SEATS

It still felt awkward preaching to an empty church. Later when I checked out the recording online, I could see that my preaching was smooth and the awkwardness I felt was not disruptive nor disturbed the flow of the delivery.

I counted five in the worship team and seven in the audio and media team. I felt for them. They have been fantastic in their commitment and stamina. They are so professional in their attitude and spirit even though they are all volunteers. I praise God for them, especially Zephaniah who leads the media team and Ethel who leads the worship ministry. The Lord will not forget the works they have done in his name and for the church.

FEELING FOR BUSINESS OWNERS AND PASTORAL STAFF

I noticed the traffic was lighter than usual due to the government’s strict directives to curb the spread of covid 19, especially the rule of no dine-in and social groups limited to only two. Human traffic at malls and restaurants would be affected too. A lot of businesses would be affected besides malls and F&B and entertainment establishments. I feel for the business owners.

This setback is three steps forward and two steps backward. Before I retired, the church was streaming services with no on-site congregation. Then things improved and the church returned to on-site worship of our three congregations of 50 to 100, office staff meetings and prayer meetings and even prayer retreats. It was two steps forward and I even solemnised a wedding with a hundred guests in attendance. Then suddenly this frustrating announcement of a pull back to stricter Phase 2 precautions. Of all days, on a Friday. Which meant the stressed pastoral staff had to make a judgment call, and implement and communicate all the changes in 48 hours. They cancelled the on-site congregation worship on Sunday. I feel for the pastoral team. It can be draining, discouraging and frustrating to rapidly respond to all these sudden changes. Two steps backward.

I also feel for those who had already planned wedding receptions and dinners on Sunday, two days before the announcements. The ups and downs, and back and forth, that wedding couples face will make what is meant to be one of their happiest memories, a nightmare, and their honeymoon a pity-party. Lord, have mercy and brighten these couples with a quiet peace and joy to sustain them in the midst of discouragement and helplessness.

THE LORD SITS ENTHRONED

Regardless of how we feel, we have to believe in the face of all this mess that “the Lord sits enthroned over the flood” (Psalm 29:10). Floods can be chaotic and disruptive and destructive but the Psalmist saw God as Sovereign over uncontrollable forces. We are still one step ahed from where we were during the circuit breaker lock-down. We have much to give thanks for compared to other countries struggling with larger populations and lesser resources and weaker governance. Therefore, stay calm and keep praying and walking in the Spirit. Rejoice in the Lord, and not in the sad situation we find ourselves in. Rejoice that He sits enthroned over the flood.

Eagle Story Shot Down

13 May 2021 blogpastor Leave a comment

I confess that I have once used this story about the eagle’s renewal in my sermon. I had assumed it was true but now know it is not based on facts. Where and how it originated, I do not know but I can understand its powerful appeal to both the preacher and the congregation. It is a story of hope, of turn-around, of transformation. Sadly it is still available on the internet and preachers still tell the story.

THE ROMANTIC STORY OF AN EAGLE’S RENEWAL

This story has been circulated in a slide presentation and its origin is unknown. Here is one version of the story of the eagle’s renewal:

“The Eagle has the longest life-span among birds. It can live up to 70 years. But to reach this age, the eagle must make a hard decision. In its 40th year its long and flexible talons can no longer grab prey which serves as food. Its long and sharp beak becomes bent. It’s old-aged and heavy wings, due to their thick feathers, stick to its chest and make it difficult to fly. Then the eagle is left with only two options: die or go through a painful process of change which lasts 150 days. The process requires that the eagle fly to a mountain top and sit on its nest. There the eagle knocks its beak against a rock until it plucks it out. Then the eagle will wait for a new beak to grow back and then it will pluck out its talons. When its new talons grow back, the eagle starts plucking its old-aged feathers. And after 5 months, the eagle takes its famous flight of rebirth and lives for 30 more years.”

THE STORY DEBUNKED BY EXPERT

Now here is the feel-good story refuted by someone who knows better: “This has brought to mind a story that I occasionally get asked by visitors at The National Eagle Center and I have also seen it pop up in the chat room as well. It is how when an eagle gets to be about 40 years old and wants to live for another 30 years or more, the eagle will fly to a mountain top and go through a rebirth.

This is an inspiring story that has circulated widely on the internet for years. It is a story of transformation and determination to live. The wide appeal of this story speaks to the eagle’s extraordinary power to captivate and inspire human beings. While this story is inspiring, and may offer us a way to reflect on our own life journey, the story is just that, a story. It is not accurate biologically. I have underlined what the storyteller usually says and then I have written below that a rebuttal to that statement.

“The eagle has the longest life-span among birds”

Eagles typically live between 20-30 years in the wild. As apex predators, they are relatively long-lived compared to many other birds. The oldest wild eagle on record is about 32 years of age.

“It can live up to 70 years. But to reach this age, the eagle must make a hard decision. In its 40’s its long and flexible talons can no longer grab prey which serves as food.”

Talons are hard, sharp and curved throughout the eagle’s life. Talons and the beak are made out of keratin, the same material as our fingernails. Think about how long it takes for your nails to grow.

“Its long and sharp beak becomes bent”

An eagle’s beak is hooked to rip and tear it’s food. It has this distinctive hooked beak throughout its life, like all birds of prey. Beak and talons are critical to eagles’ ability to catch and consume food. No eagle can survive without a beak or talons for any amount of time.

“Its old-aged and heavy wings, due to their thick feathers, become stuck to its’ chest and make it difficult to fly”

Feathers are replaced throughout an eagle’s life. The process is called molting. An eagle does not lose all of its feathers at one time. It is a gradual process, continually renewing the feathers.

“Then the eagle is left with only two options: DIE or go through a painful process of change which lasts 150 days. The process requires that the eagle fly to a mountain top and sit on it’s nest.”

An eagle’ nest is used only for the rearing of the young. Eagles do not use their nest except for the few months of the year when they are actively raising their young.

“There the eagle knocks its’ beak against a rock until it plucks it out”

Beak and talons are critical to eagles’ ability to catch and consume food. NO eagle can survive without a beak or talons.

“When its new talons grow back, the eagle starts plucking its’ old-aged feathers”

An eagle cannot survive without food for anything close to 150 days. A few days without food might be possible, but no longer.

“And after five months, the eagle takes its’ famous flight of rebirth and lives for 30 MORE YEARS”

Reading the story definitely makes you feel good, but remember it is biologically impossible for this story to be true. Our story that we are watching on this webcam is true, and we all are learning a lot by watching it!”

A NOTE TO PREACHERS

Sorry preachers, one of our favourite crowd-pleasing stories have been cremated before our eyes. We need to verify stories that seem far-fetched, fantastic, astounding. These days the internet makes it possible for us to verify the claims of others before we present it to our people in sermons.

We have to be careful or our people will believe a lie and circulate false facts around making them look ridiculous and naïve. Our integrity is also called to question, and if not our integrity, our due diligence as preachers. “Do your best to present yourself approved to God, an unashamed workman who accurately handles the word of truth.”(2 Tim 2:15 ESV)